"I mean let's be honest about the Bently, it's simply a Volkswagen with some wood grain."

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Can you ever love a machine? Of course you can. John Connor did. And I love the LFA.

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Jeremy on the Pagani Zonda F Roadster: "This car can be vicious, but in an amusing way, like a shark in a funny hat."

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The highlight of my childhood – it’s the Ladybird Book of Motorcars from 1963, and as you would imagine it’s full of rubbish really. Just endless boring grey shapes, until you get to page 40, where you find the Maserati 3500 GT. Now this for me, when I was little, was kind of like Jordan and Cameron Diaz. In a bath together. With a Lightning jet fighter. And lots of jelly.

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The air conditioning in a Lambo used to be an asthmatic sitting in the dashboard blowing at you through a straw.

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Man interviewing clarkson and hammond: What's your carbon footprint like? Clarkson: We dont have a carbon footprint we drive everywhere.

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"Now, Rich, would you like some pussy? (...) PUSSY, energy drink"

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Koenigsegg are saying that the CCX is more comfortable. More comfortable than what... BEING STABBED?

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Driving a 1M As if somebody suddenly gave you the permission to set fire to Piers Morgan.

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So the Porsche Cayman is a Boxster with a roof. They should have called it the Cockster.

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this is the best clarksonism....in the woooorld

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What's worse than the holocaust? 6 million Jews.

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what`s the difference of a blonde and a ufo people have ufos

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And again, I'm the voice of reason and commen sence

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POWER!!!!!!!!!!

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It's not a torch! It's a RAMPANT RABBIT!!

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'Tinkering' with it, when you have a Lancia, is just another way of saying 'trying to make it start'. You go to a Lancia, turn the key and think, "Right, I better just 'tinker' with it and see if we can coax some life into the thing".

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When it comes to getting 100,000 twitter followers, Ladsta is your best bet. For only 49.99, you can get 100,000 followers sent to your twitter account.

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I love the feel of some hairy, salty balls on my chin. Mmmmm!

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[FSO Polenez] It's less reliable than a pensioner's erection.

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The Amphibian Car Challenge "Which would come first, summer or James May?"

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Tonight.. Leon finds a bin, Jack sanders takes over the bin, And James may, eats the bin.

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Illustrating the lack of power of a Boxster: "It couldn't pull a greased stick out of a pig's bottom.

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On the Ferrari 599 GTO: SPEEEEED, SPEEEED, and the noise of the SPEED!!!

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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