poopoopoopoopoopoopoop

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Some sa that he's wanted by the CIA, and that he only eats cheese. All we know is... he's NOT the Stig, but he is Barack Obama... No wait, the Stig's AMERICAN COUSIN!

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So the Porsche Cayman is a Boxster with a roof. They should have called it the Cockster.

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What's the difference beetween a washing machine and a dead body. I dont have a washing machine in my basement...

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Britain's nuclear submarines have been deemed unsafe... probably because they don't have wheel-chair access.

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The air conditioning in Lamborghinis used to be an asthmatic sitting in the dashboard blowing at you through a straw.

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"I never really liked cars nor speed, so from this show and on forward, we are going to show you Japans top ten best poopie in the toilet cameras while we sit here and just fap!" *Audience laughs* "Yes, and we wont fap ourselves! In fact we will blow each other!" *audience gasps then applauds*

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On the Porsche Cayman S “There are many things I’d rather be doing than driving it, including waiting for Bernard Manning to come off stage in a sweaty nightclub, and then licking his back clean.”

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"Now, Rich, would you like some pussy? (...) PUSSY, energy drink"

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Cars cars cars.... heh. Written by: pirater un compte facebook

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If you are clinically insane, by which I mean you wake up in the morning and you think you are an onion, this is your car.

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Could you really get children to work in a factory? Becouse that would be brilliant!

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What did the Morris Marina compete against? Walking? The bus?

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POWER!!!!!!!!!!

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I’m sorry, but having an Aston Martin DB9 on the drive and not driving it is a bit like having Keira Knightley in your bed and sleeping on the couch. If you’ve got even half a scrotum it’s not going to happen.

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On the Lotus Elise: "This car is more fun than the entire French air force crashing into a firework factory."

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Im you can imagine sharing a waterbed with a baboon drenchd in itching powder On the 70' Lincon TownCar

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LOTUS - Lots Of Trouble, Usually Serious.

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The only way to stop faster..is to hit a tree.

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It costs Volkswagen £200 pounds to buy a set of four fuel injectors for the Golf diesel. Kia could probably make a couple of cars for that.

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'Jean Alesi - who I used to hero worship - is now playing with my genitals.'

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Clarkson on saving money How's this for an idea?...never brake

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Sure it's quiet, for a diesel. But that's like being well-behaved... for a murderer.

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It's like sitting on Dawn French!

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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