[On the Aston Martin DBS]: "I especially like the gear lever, which is like a Power Ranger's leg"

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Scientists are trying 2… . figure out how long… . a person can live … . without brain… . . . Please tell them ur age!!! Hindi TV Shows

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On the Ferrari Enzo: MOMMY!!!

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"Now, Rich, would you like some pussy? (...) PUSSY, energy drink"

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In the WOOORLD...

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Deal with it

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It sounds like a bear. A burning bear!

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This is what scares me. It's called the Trojan and because it's part tank, part bulldozer, it's the king of...wherever it damn well wants to go.

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I'll tell you what. We'll try it my way first... and then we'll finish.

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On the Vauxhall Astra VXR No, listen, listen, listen, you won't be at the party if you drive one of these because you'll have torque-steered into a tree on the way. And you'd be killed, and that's important to die in an anecdote...your children will say "daddy died in a fireball in a Vauxhall and a tree!"

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Now the interesting thing about this car is that under the bonnet it doesn't have an engine. What you get instead is a small field mouse called Gerald.

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It stands out like

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Where do I like to watch my car videos? You guessed it. CarVideos site

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On the McLaren P1: "And as you hurdle around in a puddle of your own feces, grinning like an infant, the car is working on ways to go even faster."

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On the BMW x5 h&m The result is like putting a furious weasel in your underpants

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Listen to this chap. He wants to "bitch slap his hoe" why not. Good luck to ya fella

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I agree the price is a bit steep, it's perilously close to the Ferrari 599, but honestly, you cannot buy a DB9 anymore; you just can't do it.  Because one day, you will be sitting at a set of lights, someone will pull up alongside in one of these and you will feel hopeless and inadequate, and you will have to kill yourself.

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Best Driving Roads: Yep, ah, It’s unlikely to be here cause everyone does 5mph (N. America), it’s not going to be here cause everyone is on drugs (S. America), that’s just all full of Ox (Africa), Al Gore says that’s gone (Antarctica) so its not going to be down there, That’s just all Spiders (Australia), sign posts are all full of gibberish (Japan), They’re all communist (Kazakhstan/Russia), can’t go there cause the Americans will shoot you (Iraq)

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Best to you with our ice cream van with a gun on top of it.

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3 nominations on that award and David Coulthard finished 4th.

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And again, I'm the voice of reason and commen sence

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If you are clinically insane, by which I mean you wake up in the morning and you think you are an onion, this is your car.

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Q:what's the difference between a blonde and a u.f.o A:people seen u.f.o s

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On the Porsche Cayenne “I’ve seen gangrenous wounds better looking than this!”

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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