You can't be a true petrolhead until you've owned an Alfa Romeo

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The Ford Focus "It's like an Air Hostess wearing orange"

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I don't know why we became clarksonisms, Think your fancy HUH.

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Man interviewing clarkson and hammond: What's your carbon footprint like? Clarkson: We dont have a carbon footprint we drive everywhere.

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What's the point of having the fastest car in the world, if its brakes always keep breaking down?

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Britain's nuclear submarines have been deemed unsafe... probably because they don't have wheel-chair access.

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Clarkson's highway code on cyclists: "Trespassers in the motorcars domain, they do not pay road tax and therefore have no right to be on the road, some of them even believe they are going fast enough to not be an obstruction. Run them down to prove them wrong."

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Koenigsegg are saying that the CCX is more comfortable. More comfortable than what... BEING STABBED?

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The Suzuki Wagon R should be avoided like unprotected sex with an Ethiopian transvestite.

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The last time someone was as wrong as you, was when a politician stepped off an aeroplane in 1939 waving a piece of paper in the air saying there will be no war with Germany.

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Usually, a Range Rover would be beaten away from the lights by a diesel powered wheelbarrow.

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On the Vauxhall Vectra VXR: "there is a word to describe this car. It begins with 's' and ends with ‘t' and it isn't soot."

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Kia Rio "You may have seen The Fly II, in which a scientist attempts to teleport a dog. In one of the most gruesome scenes I’ve seen in a film it arrives at its destination completely inside out. Well the Rio is uglier than that. Inside, things get worse. "Small wonder Kia’s importer in Britain is sponsoring the Pedestrian Association’s Walking Bus scheme. The idea is that parents take it in turns to walk a group, or "bus", of children to their school in a morning. After three days of being transported in the Rio, my kids thought it was a brilliant idea to walk instead. Even though their school is 18 miles away and it was blowing a gale directly from the Canadian tundra."

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Killing a mamooth

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Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide.

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The air conditioning in a Lambo used to be an asthmatic sitting in the dashboard blowing at you through a straw.

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Driving a 1M As if somebody suddenly gave you the permission to set fire to Piers Morgan.

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On oliver top gear car of the year 2007 - "I would rather eat my gentleman vegetables"

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What did the Morris Marina compete against? Walking? The bus?

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I would buy that car if I was the sort of person who looked at their sister and thought, mmmmmm.

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On the Porsche Boxster “It couldn't pull a greased stick out of a pig’s bottom.

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Now we get quite a lot of complaints that we don't feature enough affordable cars on the show… so we'll kick off tonight with the cheapest Ferrari of them all!

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Am i the only one here who doesnt know what a clarksonism is?

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The back of the BMW 6 series... it looks like a tramp's hat!

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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