Koenigsegg are saying that the CCX is more comfortable. More comfortable than what... BEING STABBED?

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I was reading The Mirror the other day and came across a letter from a reader who wrote, 'I was riding my bike to work when this red Ferrari pulled up next to me. Out of the window, Jeremy Clarkson shouted 'Get a car', and drove off.' What I actually said was, 'Get a car you hatchet faced, leaf-eating N**i.

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Some Poos Come Out

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(Referring to the Morris Marina) "The unpleasant log laid by British Leyland after communism crept like an itchy red blanket over the shop floor."

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When it comes to getting 100,000 twitter followers, Ladsta is your best bet. For only 49.99, you can get 100,000 followers sent to your twitter account.

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In Bolivia when a bridge had to be built Clarkson (firing up a chainsaw): I AM THE GOD OF HELLFIRE Hammond: He's got a chainsaw, hasn't he? Clarkson: OH YES! Hammond: Oh God.

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Clarkson's highway code on cyclists: "Trespassers in the motorcars domain, they do not pay road tax and therefore have no right to be on the road, some of them even believe they are going fast enough to not be an obstruction. Run them down to prove them wrong."

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On the Ferrari Enzo: MOMMY!!!

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Today Jeremy Clarkson Married a Lamborghini and move to Switz

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Whatsapp Status

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As useful as a snooze alarm on a smoke detector

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I do not understand why some people refer to their cars as "She" , lovingly. You never screw your car.

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Richard, you're the type of person I could show a picture of Paris Hilton, and you would say "But what if she turned out to be intelligent?"

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Doesn't matter if it's Hell in a Cell, Rage in a Cage or Painus in your anus!

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"Aston Martin DB9. That's not really a racing car, that's just pornography."

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Claire chris paul steve & dave

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I don't understand bus lanes. Why do poor people have to get to places quicker than I do?

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Britain's nuclear submarines have been deemed unsafe... probably because they don't have wheel-chair access.

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Can you ever love a machine? Of course you can. John Connor did. And I love the LFA.

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I would buy that car if I was the sort of person who looked at their sister and thought, mmmmmm.

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The BMW X5 M "... And I don't know about you, but I find this interior ... rather boring. Apart from that obviously, the torque thing. It's like sitting in someone's ear."

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It sounds like a bear. A burning bear!

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The only way to stop faster..is to hit a tree.

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You can't be a true petrolhead until you've owned an Alfa Romeo

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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