Tonight.. Leon finds a bin, Jack sanders takes over the bin, And James may, eats the bin.

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The air conditioning in Lambos used to be an asthmatic sitting in the dashboard blowing at you through a straw.

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What's significant about San Francisco? Nothing really, just gay people.

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[On the Aston Martin DBS]: "I especially like the gear lever, which is like a Power Ranger's leg"

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On the BMW x5 h&m The result is like putting a furious weasel in your underpants

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On the McLaren P1: "This car is about as well equipped as a pair of Monk's underpants."

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"Lancia did have some issues; for example, the Gamma exploded every time you turned the steering wheel"

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The air conditioning in a Lambo used to be an asthmatic sitting in the dashboard blowing at you through a straw.

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The Stig: Some say he was born in space, and that he is illegal in 17 U.S. states.

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When you reach he limits of grip, the Jaguar XJ220 demands a special technique. You put your foot on the clutch, and repeat after me: Our Father, who art in heaven, I'll be there in a minute.

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poopoopoopoopoopoopoop

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Volkswagen Jetta "I’d love to meet the man who styled the exterior, to find out if he’d done it as some sort of a joke. But mostly I’d like to meet the man who simply didn’t bother at all with the interior. Because looking at that dashboard gives you some idea of what it might be like to be dead."

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most of you will think that showing up in cars like these in romania is like going to somalia with a suit made out of food...

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In resent weeks a craving for nicotine has made me angry with everything, even trees.

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During the color-mixing for the elderly-friendly Fiat (Multipla) Rover James: "So you can make any color we want? Can you do my left nipple?"

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I'll tell you what, Richard. You go around our track on your Hayabusa at top speed and I'll chain smoke and we'll see who dies first.

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Motor from a food blender?

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On the Mercedes SL Black: "there's no point even trying to turn. The steering wheel is useless, this thing has the turning circle of a full moon!"

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Flying fish wasabi?

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In a list of the five most rubbish things in the world, I’d have America’s foreign policy at five. Aids at four. Iran’s nuclear programme at three. Gordon Brown at two and Maserati’s gearbox at number one. It is that bad.

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I'd have [striking workers] shot. I would take them outside and execute them in front of their families.

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tonight... we test drive... a fiat punto. a VW golf and adam burdass

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On the Koenigsegg CCX “I think Koenigsegg is Swedish for: Oh no, my head has just exploded!”

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Whenever I’m suffering from insomnia, I just look at a picture of a Toyota Camry and I’m straight off.

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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