On the Koenigsegg CCX “I think Koenigsegg is Swedish for: Oh no, my head has just exploded!”

What did the orphan kids get for Christmas? Cancer.

I was reading The Mirror the other day and came across a letter from a reader who wrote, 'I was riding my bike to work when this red Ferrari pulled up next to me. Out of the window, Jeremy Clarkson shouted 'Get a car', and drove off.' What I actually said was, 'Get a car you hatchet faced, leaf-eating N**i.

"How do I tell James to slow down?"

On the Crysler PT Cruiser: "The front looks like a face. A friendly face from the land that gave us friendly fire."

on the Peugeot 206 gti the temperature was nudging 75 F and i was headed for London in the 206. After half a mile i was suspicious, after a mile i was angry. it may have an air conditioning button but it sure as hell doesn't have air conditioning. The Rolls-Royce system works with the power of 30 domestic refrigerators. Peugeot's works with the power of an asthmatic in Bangladesh blowing at you through a straw.

Scientists are trying 2… . figure out how long… . a person can live … . without brain… . . . Please tell them ur age!!! Hindi TV Shows

we wait with anticipation

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On the Porsche Boxster “It couldn't pull a greased stick out of a pig’s bottom.

LOTUS - Lots Of Trouble, Usually Serious.

Racing cars which have been converted for road use never really work. It’s like making a hardcore adult film, and then editing it so that it can be shown in British hotels. You’d just end up with a sort of half hour close up of some bloke’s sweaty face.

Today Jeremy Clarkson Married a Lamborghini and move to Switz

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On the mclaren MP4-12C The first thing I would like to know is why they've named it after a fax machine.

Peugeot 407 Coupé 2.7 V6 HDi SE "It has the zip of a chairlift. With plodding performance and steady-as-she-goes handling the only thing this car will make you feel like is a cup of Horlicks with a splash of hemlock. Empty-nesters should buy a PlayStation instead, and spend the afternoon shooting crack whores."

You aren't allowed to have a party, you aren't allowed to have music, you aren't allowed to play ball games, you aren't allowed to have a camp fire, you have to park within two feet of a post, you have to keep quiet, you have to be in bed by eleven. This is not a holiday, it's a concentration camp!

The only person to ever look good in the back of a 4-seater convertible was Adolf Hitler.

The only way to stop faster..is to hit a tree.

"Now, Rich, would you like some pussy? (...) PUSSY, energy drink"

Das Stig is a manaic!

It's not a torch! It's a RAMPANT RABBIT!!

(Upon seeing a gentleman with shoulder-length hair in the audience): "Jesus is here!"

I love the feel of some hairy, salty balls on my chin. Mmmmm!

Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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