- Clarksonisms

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On the Enzo Ferrari "I rang up Jay Kay, who’s got one, and said: “Can we borrow yours?” and he said, “Yeah, if I can borrow your daughter, because it amounts to the same thing."

M3 drivers have no friends.

The Suzuki Wagon R should be avoided like unprotected sex with an Ethiopian transvestite.

I would buy that car if I was the sort of person who looked at their sister and thought, mmmmmm.

A turbo: exhaust gasses go into the turbocharger and spin it, witchcraft happens and you go faster.

The last time someone was as wrong as you, was when a politician stepped off an aeroplane in 1939 waving a piece of paper in the air saying there will be no war with Germany.

Clarkson's highway code on cyclists: "Trespassers in the motorcars domain, they do not pay road tax and therefore have no right to be on the road, some of them even believe they are going fast enough to not be an obstruction. Run them down to prove them wrong."

Now we get quite a lot of complaints that we don't feature enough affordable cars on the show… so we'll kick off tonight with the cheapest Ferrari of them all!

Britain's nuclear submarines have been deemed unsafe... probably because they don't have wheel-chair access.

Koenigsegg are saying that the CCX is more comfortable. More comfortable than what... BEING STABBED?

POWER!!!!!!!!!!

Cars cars cars.... heh. Written by: pirater un compte facebook

The BMW X5 M "... And I don't know about you, but I find this interior ... rather boring. Apart from that obviously, the torque thing. It's like sitting in someone's ear."

Now what you get under the bonnet of this car is not an engine. You get a little field mouse named Gerald.

I’d like to consider Ferrari as a scaled down version of God.

I'll tell you what. We'll try it my way first... and then we'll finish.

[On Hammond's Dolomite Sprint] My washing machine moves around the kitchen faster than that!

Man interviewing clarkson and hammond: What's your carbon footprint like? Clarkson: We dont have a carbon footprint we drive everywhere.

And, it's made in Britain! Which is another way of saying the door is going to fall off.

While discussing The Stig's tube leg of the race, on foot through london, "....or stig could be mistaken for a Brazillian plumber". Not very PC but very apt - and you are left in no doubt on his thoughts on the subject.

During the color-mixing for the elderly-friendly Fiat (Multipla) Rover James: "So you can make any color we want? Can you do my left nipple?"

On the Vauxhall Vectra VXR: "there is a word to describe this car. It begins with 's' and ends with ‘t' and it isn't soot."

Clarksonisms

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