- Clarksonisms

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Speed saves people!

On Gallardo Spyder "I am in love!"

"Aston Martin DB9. That's not really a racing car, that's just pornography."

Every year, the world's Golf GTI enthusiasts congregate in a field in Austria, and they talk about fuel injection and wear jumpers with "GTI" on them. Frankly I'd rather blow-torch my nipples off.

Much more of a hoot to drive than you might imagine. Think of it if you like, as a librarian with a G-string under her tweed pants. I do, and it helps.

Some say that he sucks the moisture from ducks, and his crash helmet is modeled off of Britney Spears' head... All we know is he's called the Stig!

During the Bugatti vs airplane trip "I will not be beaten by Captain Slow's flying washing machine!"

I'm sorry, but having a DB9 on the drive and not driving it is a bit like having Keira Knightley in your bed and sleeping on the couch.

What's worse than the holocaust? 6 million Jews.

Am i the only one here who doesnt know what a clarksonism is?

POOOOWERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!

It has dials the size of a fat spaniels face.

I'll tell you what, Richard. You go around our track on your Hayabusa at top speed and I'll chain smoke and we'll see who dies first.

If you are clinically insane, by which I mean you wake up in the morning and you think you are an onion, this is your car.

On The Stig: Some say that he was a science experiment gone wrong and that he only eats cheese. All we know is, he's called the stig!

Killing a mamooth

If you've got a better route map from the AA website, why don't you write to us at 'I asked the AA for a route to King's Lynn and now I'm on the International Space Station', Top Gear, London

This [Ferrari F60 Enzo] isn't just uncool, it's seriously uncool. Think of it this way, if you walk into the bathroom and see a man standing suspiciously close to the urinal, he probably owns one of them.

Now the interesting thing about this car is that under the bonnet it doesn't have an engine. What you get instead is a small field mouse called Gerald.

What's the difference beetween a washing machine and a dead body. I dont have a washing machine in my basement...

Richard, you're the type of person I could show a picture of Paris Hilton, and you would say "But what if she turned out to be intelligent?"

"Lancia did have some issues; for example, the Gamma exploded every time you turned the steering wheel"

Now that we have power steering, all you have to do [to race] is lie down, turn the wheel, and if you want to win all you have to do is go a little bit faster than all the others.

Clarksonisms

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