On the McLaren P1: "This car is about as well equipped as a pair of Monk's underpants."

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Can you ever love a machine? Of course you can. John Connor did. And I love the LFA.

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I agree the price is a bit steep, it's perilously close to the Ferrari 599, but honestly, you cannot buy a DB9 anymore; you just can't do it.  Because one day, you will be sitting at a set of lights, someone will pull up alongside in one of these and you will feel hopeless and inadequate, and you will have to kill yourself.

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I agree the price is a bit steep, it's perilously close to the Ferrari 599, but honestly, you cannot buy a DB9 anymore; you just can't do it.  Because one day, you will be sitting at a set of lights, someone will pull up alongside in one of these and you will feel hopeless and inadequate, and you will have to kill yourself.

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I'm in the seat of a Ford Sierra Cosworth, holding a flamethrower. Can't get much happier than that.

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[On the Citroen Berlingo]: "It's a very good car, so long as you want something that's equipped like a Romanian jail'

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It stands out like

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That Zonda, really! It’s like a lion in orange dungarees. Kind of fierce, but ridiculous all at the same time.

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You know what's funny? The Joke below this one.

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The BMW X5 M "... And I don't know about you, but I find this interior ... rather boring. Apart from that obviously, the torque thing. It's like sitting in someone's ear."

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"Still, if you want one [X5 M], get your nurse to find you a crayon and write out a check for seventy six thousand pounds...or if you don't understand how crayons work, you could spend even more on this rather ugly Audi."

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In the olden days, Ferrari used to build their racing cars with a lot of passion and enthusiasm. Then, on lap 3 as often as not, they would explode into a passionate and enthusiastic fireball. Since then, they've started building their racing cars with with science and math...

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Speed is the solution to everything, not that I have ever done it, I mean I love speed but, not the other thing, the actual speed, the thing that makes you go really crazy and feel adrenaline curse trough you like hell! No not the stimulant, well actually... ...COME ON YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN! (believe it or not, this is how he behaved when drunk 5 years ago, funny guy even when he is not trying to)

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On the Brabus SL: "A 1000 torques is what you'd use for... restarting a dead planet."

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Pintos are like virgin girls. You hit one in the rear and BOOM!

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Hating jewd isn't rascist, it's actually called being anti-semetist

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On The Stig: Some say that he was a science experiment gone wrong and that he only eats cheese. All we know is, he's called the stig!

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'Tinkering' with it, when you have a Lancia, is just another way of saying 'trying to make it start'. You go to a Lancia, turn the key and think, "Right, I better just 'tinker' with it and see if we can coax some life into the thing".

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On James May: "He also hasn't got a penis cause it came off once."

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Whatsapp Status

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I do not understand why some people refer to their cars as "She" , lovingly. You never screw your car.

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And after a riged phone vote , The Stig has a new name. He called Cuddles

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Speed has never killed anyone - suddenly becoming stationary, that's what gets you. - SMC Digital

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I don't know why we became clarksonisms, Think your fancy HUH.

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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