Tonight.. Leon finds a bin, Jack sanders takes over the bin, And James may, eats the bin.

Today Jeremy Clarkson Married a Lamborghini and move to Switz

Man interviewing clarkson and hammond: What's your carbon footprint like? Clarkson: We dont have a carbon footprint we drive everywhere.

I'm sorry, but having a DB9 on the drive and not driving it is a bit like having Keira Knightley in your bed and sleeping on the couch.

On the Ferrari Enzo: MOMMY!!!

"Now, Rich, would you like some pussy? (...) PUSSY, energy drink"

Converting a racing car into a street car is like watching porn with all the good bits cut out... all you end up watching is a close up of some sweaty bloke bobbing his head for half an hour.

(Clarksons article regarding his daughters first car) " I wanted something with 2000 airbags, I wanted a bouncy castle with wipers"

"Lancia did have some issues; for example, the Gamma exploded every time you turned the steering wheel"

most of you will think that showing up in cars like these in romania is like going to somalia with a suit made out of food...

James: I'm curious, Jeremy, what is it that you don't get about bikes? Jeremy: I just don't want to have to dress up like a Power Ranger to go down to the pub and drink orange juice all afternoon.

The Stig: Some say he was born in space, and that he is illegal in 17 U.S. states.

It's like putting a furious weasel in your underpants!

The only way to stop faster..is to hit a tree.

When you reach he limits of grip, the Jaguar XJ220 demands a special technique. You put your foot on the clutch, and repeat after me: Our Father, who art in heaven, I'll be there in a minute.

On paddle shift automatic gearboxes “The thing is, it’s a gearbox, okay? It has one job to do! One job! Pull the lever… ‘Am I a pencil? Am I a cauliflower? Am I a nuclear power station – I’m a gearbox! Oh, heavens, I’m gonna swap some cogs around!’”

This is the greatest car ... In the world

The air conditioning in a Lambo used to be an asthmatic sitting in the dashboard blowing at you through a straw.

I don't always play guitar, but when I do, I'm awesome.

I don't often agree with the RSPCA as I believe it is an animal's duty to be on my plate at supper time.

On the Ford GT40 “Was this the greatest hypercar of them all? Well, that’s a question I’ve never really been able to answer, because the GT40 is 40 inches tall... and I'm not.”

I believe in speed - power... power and speed solve many things!

I do not understand why some people refer to their cars as "She" , lovingly. You never screw your car.

On the BMW X5 M There's a gallon of fuel gone there, and another there...and yet another there. As a matter of fact, the only way this car could be less annoying to eco-mentalists is if its engine ran on sliced dolphin.

Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

When you're done here, check out our car fail site!

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.