The BMW X5 M "... And I don't know about you, but I find this interior ... rather boring. Apart from that obviously, the torque thing. It's like sitting in someone's ear."

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And again, I'm the voice of reason and commen sence

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(On the TukTuk) I think I have cancer now.

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what`s the difference of a blonde and a ufo people have ufos

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On the Ferrari 599 GTO: SPEEEEED, SPEEEED, and the noise of the SPEED!!!

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Look at this fellow, he wants to bitch slap his hoe. Why not? Good luck to you fellow.

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Speed saves people!

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On the BMW x5 h&m The result is like putting a furious weasel in your underpants

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Driving a 1M As if somebody suddenly gave you the permission to set fire to Piers Morgan.

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"Aston Martin DB9. That's not really a racing car, that's just pornography."

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on the corvette: So if you want a car with vietnamese suspension that is made out of plastic, this is the car for you!

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On paddle shift automatic gearboxes “The thing is, it’s a gearbox, okay? It has one job to do! One job! Pull the lever… ‘Am I a pencil? Am I a cauliflower? Am I a nuclear power station – I’m a gearbox! Oh, heavens, I’m gonna swap some cogs around!’”

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Clarkson watching someone drive a lada and being offered to ride one. "Its are raping him! And then its going to rape me!... OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD!

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I'm not Just the Iron In Yard, I'm a Member

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Biathletes need to eat 6,000 calories a day: six thousand! That’s the equivalent of two pounds of butter, 70 slices of bread, 112 eggs, 86 tabs of yogurts, 28 potatoes, 117 biscuits and 21 Twix bars. On that basis, I could be an Olympic biathlete!

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M3 drivers have no friends.

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When you buy a Honda, well, your stuck with a Honda.

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I don't know why we became clarksonisms, Think your fancy HUH.

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Hold on to your spleens everyone!

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Pintos are like virgin girls. You hit one in the rear and BOOM!

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Best to you with our ice cream van with a gun on top of it.

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Where do I like to watch my car videos? You guessed it. CarVideos site

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... And across the line!

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A Hummer; You need 280574965897831756791492756237859087683472390645839057644382457684385739248759320842013878742178347658375843921764 gallons of gas to get out of the garage.

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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