So you’re not buying a Bristol for the number of gizmos or the way those that you do get are attached to the car. I carefully examined the front air splitter, for instance, and deduced that it must have been put there by a horse. No, really. As Sherlock Holmes himself advised: “When you have eliminated the impossible” — and it is impossible to imagine a human making such a hash of it — “then what remains, no matter how implausible, must be the truth.” So it was a horse.

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Tonight.. Leon finds a bin, Jack sanders takes over the bin, And James may, eats the bin.

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Shut up with all your terrible banter!!!

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That Zonda, really! It’s like a lion in orange dungarees. Kind of fierce, but ridiculous all at the same time.

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Who ever said Leon Austin is a tramp.. He's not a tramp.. he's just a homeless person living on the streets. Me personally, i think they're different things.

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I do not understand why some people refer to their cars as "She" , lovingly. You never screw your car.

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On the Ferrari Enzo: MOMMY!!!

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On the Enzo Ferrari "I rang up Jay Kay, who’s got one, and said: “Can we borrow yours?” and he said, “Yeah, if I can borrow your daughter, because it amounts to the same thing."

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I would buy that car if I was the sort of person who looked at their sister and thought, mmmmmm.

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Nope, Moral Man the people`s champion does not know either... Moral: Now and forever, I am Moral Man.

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I don't know why we became clarksonisms, Think your fancy HUH.

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Don't do that, tortoise!

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what`s the difference of a blonde and a ufo people have ufos

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"Aston Martin DB9. That's not really a racing car, that's just pornography."

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On the TVR Tuscan 2 “It’s supposed to be easier to live with, and easier to drive... so has it worked? Ohh... Oh, my God. No... no... no, no, no. No. No. No, it hasn’t.”

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[Alfa Romeo Brera] I only have to imagine this in black, with tan leather, and I'm nursing a semi.

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this is the best clarksonism....in the woooorld

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The only way to stop faster..is to hit a tree.

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Peugeot 407 Coupé 2.7 V6 HDi SE "It has the zip of a chairlift. With plodding performance and steady-as-she-goes handling the only thing this car will make you feel like is a cup of Horlicks with a splash of hemlock. Empty-nesters should buy a PlayStation instead, and spend the afternoon shooting crack whores."

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[In the P45]: "AH LORRY, LORRY, LORRY, LORRY! Oh a lot of poo SHOT out then!"

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Hammond: "The premiums for 17 year old girls are around half what they are for 17 year old boys" Clarkson: "Well there's a Top Gear top tip right there! If you're a 17 year old and you need car insurance, slice your penis off."

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A turbo: exhaust gasses go into the turbocharger and spin it, witchcraft happens and you go faster.

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So the Porsche Cayman is a Boxster with a roof. They should have called it the Cockster.

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On the Ferrari 599 GTO: SPEEEEED, SPEEEED, and the noise of the SPEED!!!

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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