How many years are there in donkey years?

What's the difference beetween a washing machine and a dead body. I dont have a washing machine in my basement...

On the Ferrari 599 GTO: SPEEEEED, SPEEEED, and the noise of the SPEED!!!

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If you've got a better route map from the AA website, why don't you write to us at 'I asked the AA for a route to King's Lynn and now I'm on the International Space Station', Top Gear, London

Clarkson on saving money How's this for an idea?...never brake

On the Lancia Stratos: I'm going to change gear now; this is going to involve man-touching.

This is the thing you have to remember, Alfa build a car to be as good as a car can be... briefly.

Now that we have power steering, all you have to do [to race] is lie down, turn the wheel, and if you want to win all you have to do is go a little bit faster than all the others.

During the color-mixing for the elderly-friendly Fiat (Multipla) Rover James: "So you can make any color we want? Can you do my left nipple?"

[On the Aston Martin DBS]: "I especially like the gear lever, which is like a Power Ranger's leg"

Hammond: "The premiums for 17 year old girls are around half what they are for 17 year old boys" Clarkson: "Well there's a Top Gear top tip right there! If you're a 17 year old and you need car insurance, slice your penis off."

We'll try it my way first, and then we'll finish it.

Are there any Spanish people here today? Yes? GIVE ME MY FISH BACK!

Richard, you're the type of person I could show a picture of Paris Hilton, and you would say "But what if she turned out to be intelligent?"

I'd have [striking workers] shot. I would take them outside and execute them in front of their families.

Can you ever love a machine? Of course you can. John Connor did. And I love the LFA.

On the Vauxhall vectra: it's a cure for ADD, any child with would fall asleep in 3 minutes flat

Some Poos Come Out

Grips good, if you want to win a race, grip is brilliant. BUT for drifting.. for having FUN.. grip is BAD!

Killing a mamooth

"Now, Rich, would you like some pu-sy? (...) Pu-sy, energy drink"

On Gallardo Spyder "I am in love!"

Scientists are trying 2… . figure out how long… . a person can live … . without brain… . . . Please tell them ur age!!! Hindi TV Shows

Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

When you're done here, check out our car fail site!

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