"Now, Rich, would you like some pu-sy? (...) Pu-sy, energy drink"

On the Lancia Stratos: I'm going to change gear now; this is going to involve man-touching.

POOOOWERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!

So the Porsche Cayman is a Boxster with a roof. They should have called it the Cockster.

(Upon seeing a gentleman with shoulder-length hair in the audience): "Jesus is here!"

Are there any Spanish people here today? Yes? GIVE ME MY FISH BACK!

Every year, the world's Golf GTI enthusiasts congregate in a field in Austria, and they talk about fuel injection and wear jumpers with "GTI" on them. Frankly I'd rather blow-torch my nipples off.

When you buy a Honda, well, your stuck with a Honda.

most of you will think that showing up in cars like these in romania is like going to somalia with a suit made out of food...

Some Poos Come Out

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Okay, engines for the Alfa Romeo Brera: 2.2 liters, 3.2 v6, and you can have a diesel if you're the type of person who thinks the Mona Lisa should have a moustache.

Scientists are trying 2… . figure out how long… . a person can live … . without brain… . . . Please tell them ur age!!! Hindi TV Shows

It's not a torch! It's a RAMPANT RABBIT!!

During the Bugatti vs airplane trip "I will not be beaten by Captain Slow's flying washing machine!"

Clarkson on saving money How's this for an idea?...never brake

Clarkson in a magazine, Take the Koala for instance, It spends half its life off its face on dope and the moment it gets scared it catches chlamydia

Speed has never killed anyone - suddenly becoming stationary, that's what gets you. - SMC Digital

This [Maserati Quattroporte GTS] is like having a 3-year old child. It's really annoying most of the time, but if someone tried to take it away from you, you'd kill them for it.

Could you really get children to work in a factory? Becouse that would be brilliant!

On the Ferrari 599 GTO: SPEEEEED, SPEEEED, and the noise of the SPEED!!!

Speed is the solution to everything, not that I have ever done it, I mean I love speed but, not the other thing, the actual speed, the thing that makes you go really crazy and feel adrenaline curse trough you like hell! No not the stimulant, well actually... ...COME ON YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN! (believe it or not, this is how he behaved when drunk 5 years ago, funny guy even when he is not trying to)

Richard, you're the type of person I could show a picture of Paris Hilton, and you would say "But what if she turned out to be intelligent?"

What's the difference beetween a washing machine and a dead body. I dont have a washing machine in my basement...

Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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