On the Lancia Stratos: I'm going to change gear now; this is going to involve man-touching.

This is the thing you have to remember, Alfa build a car to be as good as a car can be... briefly.

On the Vauxhall vectra: it's a cure for ADD, any child with would fall asleep in 3 minutes flat

Some Poos Come Out

Could you really get children to work in a factory? Becouse that would be brilliant!

"Now, Rich, would you like some pu-sy? (...) Pu-sy, energy drink"

It's really sad that you can now buy Hummer aftershave. It comes in a jerry can of repressed homosexuality; you slosh it over your face yelling "I'M NOT GAY!"

Hating jewd isn't rascist, it's actually called being anti-semetist

most of you will think that showing up in cars like these in romania is like going to somalia with a suit made out of food...

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Jeremy reading the safety labels on a Dodge Viper: This one is my favorite. "The top supports behind the seats are not a roll bar. This is an open vehicle--drive carefully..." No.

A Hummer; You need 280574965897831756791492756237859087683472390645839057644382457684385739248759320842013878742178347658375843921764 gallons of gas to get out of the garage.

On the Ferrari 599 GTO: SPEEEEED, SPEEEED, and the noise of the SPEED!!!

Richard, you're the type of person I could show a picture of Paris Hilton, and you would say "But what if she turned out to be intelligent?"

Claire chris paul steve & dave

Das Stig is a manaic!

Can you ever love a machine? Of course you can. John Connor did. And I love the LFA.

Are there any Spanish people here today? Yes? GIVE ME MY FISH BACK!

In resent weeks a craving for nicotine has made me angry with everything, even trees.

People think my picture of me on horsehead network is me going really fast, good thing they don't know I am actually blowing a huge invisible black guy.

We'll try it my way first, and then we'll finish it.

Shut up with all your terrible banter!!!

Look at this fellow, he wants to bitch slap his hoe. Why not? Good luck to you fellow.

Hold on to your spleens everyone!

Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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